Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
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