Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
You were trust falling into bushes
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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