K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
