Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
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