did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Randomize
