the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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