I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
