2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
