I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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