I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
