He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
