I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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