Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Randomize
