I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Randomize
