11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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