I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize