I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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