The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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