So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
