She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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