david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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