in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
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