it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
worst night to have a conscience
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize