Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
