no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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