I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
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So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
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I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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