Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Randomize
