We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
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