At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
