yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize
