just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
