I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize