I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
