She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
