8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
im holly from the hills drunk
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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