bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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