So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Panties = found
Randomize
