These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
we're so committed to being not committed
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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