I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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