What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
