no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
