Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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