singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Randomize
