yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
