I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
