so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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