It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
When did we convert life to cartoon?
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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