I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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