best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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