Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
