I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
